This is a dilemma for many people, including me. When you take time out for yourself, are you being selfish? How could you think about going for a long run when there are million things to be done at home! You could instead be spending that time with your family, or for work or for social work.
And then, on the contrary, there is innate need to do something selfless, something bigger than your own selves, a desire to make positive impact on the world. But we all get stuck on the “how”. Or we end up thinking that this is the work of a very few chosen ones, so why even bother trying.
I have come to realize that both of these are so intertwined. If taking care of yourself is selfish, be unapologetic-ally selfish. It is your biggest responsibility to care for your physical and mental health. When you see that your own life is meaningful, worth living for, you can value the lives of others. In order to help the world, help yourself first. In order to understand the world, understand yourself first – not an easy task by any means.
Tune into the conciousness behind the ego, behind the brain, behind the definitions given to you by other people. Question the things, beliefs, your own opinions that do not make sense, as sometimes unlearning is the beginning of learning. Disagree with an open heart. There is a possibility that you are wrong. Meditate and watch your thoughts. Make it a habit to pause before you react to situations. You will learn to respond appropriately.
Understand that we all share the same fate, here on earth, of birth and death, joy and pain. We have more in common than what is different. When we have that light in our hearts, we can easily lit the path for others. Our actions automatically come from a deeper place, a place closer to god. Yes, I said G word with ease now, because I feel that I am finding the answers to my questions. Cheers!
For me personally, whether I stay close or far away from the big G, I am still being selfish. That eliminates a lot of unnecessary worries from being judged by others and by the big G
LikeLiked by 3 people
Thanks Jiangsha for the read. We are all selfish to varying degrees and that’s okay. If there is any purpose to our lives, it definitely wouldn’t include worrying about what others say about us. People can’t be pleased and it’s best to stop even trying.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Yes Jyot all of us are selfish. But there are two kinds of selfishness: being stupidly selfish or being intelligently selfish ππ
And if we are intelligently selfish we have the possibility of becoming selfless …
Love and blessings ππ€
LikeLiked by 1 person
Awesome Jyot. Bulls eye π€π
When I was in college, much before you were born, I had read Virtue of Selfishness by Ayn Rand! Her, We the Living Changed my life.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you Ashokji π. I will dig those books upπ, always looking for good reads.
LikeLiked by 1 person
My pleasure. These books may not be so relevant for you today Jyot π
Her two famous books were The Fountain Head and The Atlas Shrugged
LikeLiked by 1 person
I can attest to the value of the words in The Fountainhead, that changed my life and also made me incredibly angry haha
LikeLiked by 2 people
I can well imagine π How old were you at that time Mathew?
LikeLiked by 1 person
2 years ago or so actually. How about you?
LikeLiked by 2 people
70s ! before you were born most probably π
LikeLiked by 1 person
π, it seems it is still relevant then. Also i think even though the world changes, the basic human issues remain the same. Thank you both for the feedback!
LikeLiked by 1 person
True Jyot. Basics always remain the same. The Fountain Head and the Atlas Shrugged were powerful books. In 70s I used to think if I visit US, one person I would like to meet is Ayn Rand π
LikeLike
In the 1970s or you were 70? I’m turning 31 at the end of this month.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Ha ha π I read the book in 70s when I was in my 20s π
I turned 70 last year π
Enjoy the birthday month π·π·
LikeLiked by 1 person
That makes more sense, otherwise I thought you were the most fit 100 year old that I’ve ever seen π
LikeLiked by 2 people
Lol Mathew. But Ashok is definitely very fit 70 year old!
LikeLiked by 1 person
I wouldn’t disagree!
LikeLiked by 1 person
But I am still 70 years young π
LikeLiked by 2 people
You’re only ever as old as you feel!
That’s why I’m like 80 years old.
LikeLiked by 2 people
π Don’t be that old Mathew when you r u young!
LikeLiked by 1 person
I was born thinking like a grumpy 50 year old hahah…
LikeLiked by 1 person
π€£π
LikeLiked by 1 person
Oh come on my young friend. Being wise doesnβt mean being old π
There is nothing like being a child π
The trick in life is: Remain childlike but not childish
LikeLiked by 2 people
Sage wisdom right there. Thank you Ashok!
LikeLiked by 2 people
ππ€
LikeLike
I am really curious to read it nowπ
LikeLike
It’s a little dull at times but the philosophy in it is so good once you get going
LikeLiked by 1 person
π, will give it a read.
LikeLiked by 1 person
“I have come to realize that both of these are so intertwined. If taking care of yourself is selfish, be unapologetic-ally selfish. It is your biggest responsibility to care for your physical and mental health. When you see that your own life is meaningful, worth living for, you can value the lives of others. In order to help the world, help yourself first. In order to understand the world, understand yourself first β not an easy task by any means.”
Great quote and very very true. I preach the same thing. I was always raised to be selfless only and it nearly destroyed me.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks Mathew. Your feedback means a lot.
LikeLike
Any time
LikeLiked by 1 person
Nice blog
LikeLike